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Keeping a connection whilst in a long distance relationship 

An individual calls their significant other to talk about their day.
An individual calls their significant other to talk about their day.

When one hears the words “long distance relationship,” it initially stirs a bit of intimidation. Well, at least it did for me.

Think about it, you’re not able to see your significant other the way you normally would. Not only is the distance intimidating, but the ability to maintain a connection becomes harder. Whether we realize it or not, most of our connections are based off of proximity. This makes things even more difficult as college students; creating the idea that there’s a barrier that blocks a relationship from functioning while long distance.

While that may seem probable, I’m here to tell you that a long distance relationship can work. Here are five ways in which you can keep a connection in a long distance relationship.

Keep a schedule

Having some sort of digital or physical planner will not only help you organize your personal plans but also help you in visualizing when you and your partner are available to give each other time. Whether it is during your lunch break or right before you go to bed, you will have an understanding of when to prioritize connecting with your partner.

Commit to communication

Make sure that you are finding a way to communicate with your partner. Sometimes the conversations will be three hours and other times three minutes. I understand that there are times when we do not feel like talking, but making that known to your partner, instead of ghosting them, will probably help them understand you and be more considerate of that. And contrary to what you may think, speaking to your partner might actually brighten your day and clear your mind more.

Incorporate date nights

Not being around each other does not mean that you can no longer have dates. With technology, anything is possible! So throw on your finest outfit, order some takeout and video chat your significant other for a virtual date. You can also have a movie night. Gather your favorite movie snacks, slip on a robe and watch a movie with programs like Netflix Party or Zoom (using share screen). You can get even more creative with this by adding your own little twist.

Adhere to their love language

I believe in the importance of knowing your partner’s love languages. There are five: acts of service, physical touch, quality time, receiving gifts, and words of affirmation. Adhering to their love language will help you understand how to love your partner even while you’re away. For example, my love languages are words of affirmation and acts of service, and although acts of service are difficult to do when apart, my partner will randomly send me thoughtful and reassuring messages, and this reaffirms our connection. So, study your partner’s love language, express it in your own way and let them know that they are special to you.

Cherish your moments together 

Although there are several things that can be done to keep the connection going, I believe that it is important to make the effort to see each other. This can be done by planning trips to your desired location or visiting your partner wherever they live. And when you do, make the most out of the time you have together. Cherish each other’s company by doing activities that will make you grow closer.

Overall, long distance relationships will require effort. If you are in a space where you are able and willing to make it work, it will not feel laborious at all. When you remain optimistic and change your thinking, you can think of this as just another step towards a healthy, flourishing relationship.


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