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Monday, Apr 29, 2024
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'Twilight' is still the worst



In Breaking Dawn: Part 1, yes I saw Breaking Dawn, the two star-crossed lovers straight out of a sci-fi Romeo and Juliet are given yet another set of obstacles to over-come.
In this installment of the popular series we see the marriage, honeymoon and the resulting child of Bella and Edward Cullen.
I enjoy reading the Twilight books and so as a fan I really wanted to see this first installment of the final book in theaters, but I must admit I was not blown away by the film.
I have always thought that Kristen Stewart was the worst choice of actress to play Bella Swan and this movie did little to change my mind.
While her facial expressions did seem to branch out a little in this movie, Stewart still has the same knack for delivering her lines with a pained look reminiscent of constipation on her face, hardly making her seem like a girl who is in love with anything but a toilet.
Her lack of conviction and bad acting skills are exacerbated by the pure talent of those around her.
It may just be me, but Robert Pattinson truly outshines Stewart in this installment — and that has nothing to do with the fact that he sparkles in sunlight — even Renee, Bella’s rarely seen mother, out performs Stewart in the film.
Taylor Lautner plays a love sick, jealous werewolf perfectly throughout the film and I was entranced, even though his shirt stayed on a great deal more in this film than either of the previous two.
But moving on, the dialogue in the movie was decent at best, snore-worthy as worst. In fact the most fun the audience seemed to have during the screening was the scene of wedding toasts whose slight comedic relief threw the audience a few laughs before we were thrown into the ever-present werewolf versus vampire feud.
The drama continues throughout the rest of the film with everyone but Bella and Rosalie wishing to abort the half-vamp fetus. How the characters are going to do that without seriously harming Bella escapes me.
Anyway, the majority of the film shows Stewart’s character struggling through a pregnancy that is slowly killing her.
Her child is sucking out all the nutrients in her body which is altered to a state in which every bone in Stewart’s body is visible.
Stewart looks like the campaign poster for anorexia awareness except for the baby bump and no one can figure out what to do except Jacob Black who suggests the should be obvious answer that the child probably drinks blood.
The next scene graces us with the image of Stewart drinking blood through a straw, an image I could have lived without seeing.
The next truly disgusting scene we are blessed with is the birth of the vampire baby. Stewart’s back breaks with an awful crack that makes you squirm as the scene continues on to show, in graphic detail, Edward slicing open his wife’s abdomen with his teeth and extracting a baby covered in blood and mucus.
As impossible as I think half-vampire babies are, I have to admit that the child playing Renesme Cullen is adorable, probably one of the highlights of the movie, although I do wish they had cleaned her off a little faster.
Cute babies aside, there was no need for such a disgusting portrayal in the movie, this isn’t Saw and my gag reflex wasn’t completely prepared for it nor was I prepared to see Taylor Lautner’s character cry, which did more to break my heart than the death of Stewart.
All in all, the movie was slow to pick up, lacking in good dialogue and action, and a little gross. Thank you Summit Entertainment for ruining yet another book for me.


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